Commemorating a sad day with a critical contribution to world culture

This morning, we had to put our beloved dog Manley down. He was well over sixteen, although we don't know his exact age, and after surpassing our expectations over and over for how long he would make it, it was finally time. I held him in my lap as he went, a devotion he honored by peeing all over me as he expired. I wouldn't have it any other way.

After I got home, I found myself thinking of the song "I Miss You" (보고 싶다) by Kim Bum Soo. It's from the Korean drama Stairway to Heaven (천국의 계단), which happens to be the first one I ever saw. Koreans use the expression "Korean Wave" (한류) to describe the insane rise in global popularity of Korean pop culture that started happening early this century and has only gotten bigger since. Their dramas were a big part of that wave, and this was one of the first mega successes. Kim Bum Soo's song was a big reason why.

I've had this song in my head for over twenty years, but I've never really been able to figure out the lyrics. The hardest thing about translating Korean is that the language often just doesn't state what the subject of the verb is. To use one example, without any context, the sentence "가"(which, believe it or not, is an entire sentence in one syllable), can mean: I go, he goes, she goes, we go. they go, (or "are/is going) for all of those). It can also be the imperative, "Go."

There are some really good translators out there in the world doing good work for free with Korean songs on YouTube. I figured I'd find a decent version of this song with no trouble, but all I saw was one trash translation after another. With a song this special and, without much exaggeration, of this much historical importance, having a bunch of crap English versions out there in the world just won't do. So I've worked with my most trusted Korean translation partner to produce this version below. Please feel free to refer to this if you ever feel sad and want to cry along to a song for a while.

Also, please give your dogs some love today. What kind of god loves us enough to give us something as perfect as a dog, but hates us enough to make them live such a short time?

This is a link to Kim Bum Soo singing the song in concert, along with a pretty good translation, far better than the terrible ones that are out there. I only quibble in a few places with my version, below.

 아무리 기다려도 난 못가

바보처럼 울고 있는 너의 곁에 

상처만 주는 나를 왜 모르고 

기다리니 떠나가란 말야

 

No matter how long you wait, I can't 

Be your side, where you're crying like a fool.

Why don't you know that I only hurt you?

You're waiting there, but I'm telling you to leave.

 

보고 싶다 보고 싶다 

이런 내가 미워질만큼 

울고 싶다 네게 무릎 꿇고 

모두 없던 일이 될 수 있다면

 

I miss you, I miss you 

So much I hate myself

I want to cry, come kneel in front of you

And make it like nothing ever happened.

미칠듯 사랑했던 기억이 

추억들이 너를 찾고 있지만

더 이상 사랑이란 변명에 

너를 가둘 수 없어

 

The memory of loving you like crazy,

The reminiscences are seeking you,

But I can't use love as an excuse

To keep you locked up anymore

 

이러면 안되지만 죽을만큼 보고 싶다

 

I shouldn't be like this, but I miss you so much I could die.

 

(Then the last three stanzas repeat, before it ends with the following line.)

 

죽을 만큼 잊고 싶다

I want to forget you so much I could die.