Once again, I will support your literary journal when you show me why I'd want to

While submitting stories to be considered for publication recently, I ran into this warning:

Before anything else, a special note:

If you are not currently reading/have not ever read a copy of (Journal Name Left Out), then:
perhaps you are a bit too parsimonious and short-cutty for us, as it is not that difficult to get your hands on our magazine, and it is a really good magazine (we promise) and also
the chances are maybe a bit high that you will submit fiction to us that is not what we are hunting for, because how would you know what we like to publish if you don't read what we publish. 

So, go on go on go on — just grab a copy and we'll post it straight to you, or even subscribe, and do yourself the favour of not wasting your own time, and do us the favour of supporting the magazine that you would like to be published in. We want you as a reader first, and as a contributor second, because do you know how beautiful a transition that is? 

(Really beautiful is the answer.)

I've posted about this before. Just like there are hundreds of writers submitting stories such that no journal particularly needs me, there are thousands of journals out there to which I can submit, so I don't particularly need any single one of them. These journals are largely similar in quality. Unless a journal has a stated aesthetic preference, such as for avant garde or queer or feminist or whatever, a story that could get published in one could get published in another. 

Notices like this are meant to sucker new writers into buying a subscription. Usually, I don't mind the soft sell--"the best way to know what we like is to read our journal." That's fine, I expect it. But there are thousands of journals out there. I can't subscribe to them all. I couldn't read all the content from more than ten or so of them. So does anyone really expect me to subscribe to every journal I am going to submit to? That's absurd.

This particular journal really jacked up its pitch more than other journals. They make it sound, without outright saying it, that they will not publish you unless you've subscribed or bought a copy. 

It's not short-cutty to submit to more journals than you can afford to subscribe to; it's literally the only way anyone is going to beat the odds and get published. Parsimonious? Please. I'm incredibly generous with journals--once they've published me. Just ask the journals who've published my stories. I gave one a year of volunteer service and a couple of donations. I turned down the award money from a few. I will push your social media on my social media. I will subscribe. Just publish me first. Because the best way for me to see that your journal deserves my love over all the other journals I could give it to--the best way for me to see that my tastes coincide with your editors--is for you to publish something I wrote.